A Simple Life Again (The Ferryman)

Oh Siddhartha, welcome back. We are finally back to our comfort zone. In this chapter of the book, we see Siddhartha coming back to his "true" Self. No more luxuries. No more gambling. No more desires. Just Siddhartha and the river. Siddhartha decided to stay at the river, the river that is always the same yet always different. The ferryman, who at first couldn't remember him, let him stay at his house just like that time in the past. While his stay, Siddhartha becomes the ferryman's apprentice. He wanted to learn how to "listen to the river", just like "the river taught Vasudeva to listen". Siddhartha page 86. Siddhartha and Vasudeva, the ferryman, bond over this listening to the river. They both know that not all can listen and understand the river. But they do. They can perfectly understand the river and live calmly next to it while working on it. Their lives were happy. They lived next to something they loved and at the same time worked on that same thing they loved. What a wonderful life, no? I would love to grow up and do something I love. Live in the perfect place. Maybe a city, with beaches, lots of people and traffic. Be surrounded by that active lifestyle all daylong. That would be lovely. Quite enjoyable.

Although he lived a peaceful and happy life, nothing perfect can last. It actually took quite a long time for his life to be disrupted. One day, news that Gotama was dying arrived to him. All he crossed over the river for days were groups of monks who wanted to visit their leader before he died. On one of those days, Kamala, who had left her past life behind, started following Gotama and had Siddhartha's son, rests near the riverbank with her son and gets bitten by a snake. It is up to Siddhartha and Vasudeva to try and save her life. They can't, for the bite was already far to poisoned and turning black. She dies on the same bed Vasudeva's wife died on, and gets a pyre on the same hill she did. His son was then left on his care for now, and all the days that were to come.      

A Hero at Heart? (By the River)

In this specific chapter of Siddhartha, "By the River", I can compare Siddhartha with Beast in The Beauty and the Beast. Throughout both the movie and the book, we see how our "heroes" have quite a depressing and monotonous view of life. Okay, I get why Beast is so depressing. Who wouldn't be, if they had a curse like his? But Siddhartha? I really don't understand what is his reasoning behind all the whining and all the indecision. I mean, he had a pretty decent life before all the drastic changes that occurred. Everybody loved him, his family had wealth, and he had a best-friend that was devoted to him (I still think Govinda was too obsessed with him). But I guess it is true. Money can't buy happiness. 

"He was full of ennui*, full of misery, full of death; there was nothing left in the world that could attract him, that could give him pleasure and solace." 

Siddhartha page 70. Depressing much? Now compare it to this, "As the years passed, he fell into despair and lost all hope. For who could learn to love a beast?", narrator in the Beauty and the Beast. From that last quote, we can infer that there was a time in which the Beast still had hope in the world an in ever breaking his curse. He was once happy with his life, and all he is now, is miserable. Siddhartha, on the other hand, was never really quite happy with his life. What he felt was merely contentment. Although Siddhartha's way of dealing with his situation was much more sensible than that of the Beast. Siddhartha looks for a new life that will be a perfect fit to him. He enjoys what the world has given us. He learns how to appreciate the nature around him. To exist without the material things we think so hard that we need, but that we actually don't. Beast is, well... Beast. His name pretty much describes his whole attitude towards everything and everybody. *screaming* "You will join me for dinner! That's not a request!... Well *you* shouldn't have been in the west *wing*!". What says anger management issues, better than that? Even if he has quite a bit of anger issues, it doesn't mean that that is the only thing he has. Every time I remember parts of the movie, all I remember is just a big angry, yet naive beast. In that maturity aspect, he also differs from Siddhartha. Siddhartha is a mature grown man with a more ample view of the world, and someone who accepts things that don't go the way he planned them to. But Beast is pretty much just a petulant child that pouts and whines when things don't go his way.        

Vocabulary(*):

Ennui (noun): dissatisfaction from a lack of excitement in ones life.

Just Another Wannabe (Samsara)

A new chapter of Siddhartha, a new blog entry to write.

Every time I read Siddhartha, I feel as if Siddhartha is reborn. Every single time, in every single chapter, he has a new personality or a new desire in his heart. This, of course, would be tolerable if it weren't for the fact that every new desire is completely different to the one before. This chapter "Samsara", is no different. 

In this chapter we see the change that occurred in Siddhartha during his stay with Kamaswami and Kamala. He becomes just another wannabe. Siddhartha has always prided himself in being a Samana, someone who doesn't need luxuries to live a perfectly good life, someone who doesn't indulge in petty actions like others do. But, that all changed. Siddhartha became just another one of the petty bunch. Even though he still kept some of the teachings he learned from his father, from Gotama, from Govinda, like it says in page 61 of Siddhartha: "However, many things which he had learned... he still retained for a long time. Many of these he had retained; others were submerged and covered with dust." In that excerpt of the book, we see how he still gave importance to some of the things, but at the same time, he becomes more "human". In the chapters before he is seems almost divine, not in the sense of being all powerful and "superior", but in the sense of differing to those around him. He used to separate himself from the people around him, and preferred to stay by himself and with the nature around him. He saw a certain beauty in the wold that no one else saw. But now he chooses to lead a wealthy and luxurious lifestyle, leaving his morals behind and becoming a Samana wannabe. He fools himself into believing that he IS still a Samana, when all he is is another guy who knows he is something but likes to think he is another person. All this change occurs during the first part of the chapter. It goes on until he has a dream. You could say that this dream enlightened him. He once more became the Siddhartha we are used to. The one that questions the material things in life and becomes uneasy when things seem too out of place. "Then Siddhartha knew that the game was finished, that he could play it no longer." Welcome back Siddhartha. Right after his dream, Kamala knows Siddhartha is going to leave. And she is okay with it. She knew it would happen eventually and it doesn't bother her too much. When she is informed of his disappearance, she releases the songbird. A songbird might not mean much usually, but now it meant Siddhartha' freedom. That itty bitty songbird represented Siddhartha's dream and his new found freedom. His leaving only meant that the songbird was meant to be released.         

Just a Slice of the Pie (Amongst the People)

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Have a Word (Awakening)

In this chapter of Siddhartha, we see Siddhartha having a "revelation" about his purpose and the whys to his actions.
While walking through the grove, he sees that he had never truly understood why he did what he did, up until now that is. He discovers that his need for the perfect teacher, and the perfect teachings, were because of his want to hide his true Self from himself. He has awakened, hence the name for the chapter. He doesn't fit anywhere he has ever been in before. Not with his  father, not with the Samanas, not with Govinda or Buddha. No. He needs to find himself and make a home for that new person he will discover.
Even if it was a short chapter, I feel like it was something necessary in the story. Without that little chapter, we wouldn't truly have any insight in the mind of Siddhartha, nor would we understand his reasoning for chapters to come. No matter its vitality, the chapter left some doubts in my mind:
-Siddhartha doesn't know where he is heading right now. Will he ever have a destination again?
-How come he came to this realization now, but not before?
-Will he ever try to seek out a teacher again, or will he be content with his own findings?

Some vocabulary words of this chapter:

Grove (noun): a small wood, orchard, or group of trees.

Innermost (adjective): most private, and deeply felt.

Asceticism: doctrine that believes that by giving up worldly pleasures one will achieve a higher intellectual or spiritual power.

Meditation (noun): the action or practice of meditating. (Meditating: think deeply or focus for a time for spiritual purposes or to relax).  

Are You Sure You Are Made For This? (With the Samanas & Gotama)

What a weird and unexpected end result. Who would've thought that after pestering his father so much he wouldn't of stuck to the Samana way of life? Well, I certainly didn't see that one coming. But, this is Siddhartha after all. What less could we have expected? I mean, not even my sister (who takes at least 45 minutes to choose an outfit), is that indecisive.

After pushing to become a Samana so much, Siddhartha sure didn't know what he really wanted. First of all, he decides that Samana will become his life and that it is what he wants and will always want. What happens when he gets there? Nothing works out like it was supposed to. Sure, he learns quite a few thing from them, like how to lose yourself and then find yourself again, but it wasn't enough for him. "What I have so far learned from the Samanas, I could have learned more quickly and easily in every inn in a prostitute's quarter...", Siddhartha page 13. What a sensible way to put it in. Samana is so last summer to Siddhartha.
Oh, and wait for it, Govinda is still following him around like a lost little puppy, "At his side lived Govinda, his shadow..." Siddhartha page 12. Does Siddhartha care at all? Probably not. He decides that a new turn in his religious life is needed so, naturally, he finds a new option. Buddhism. A normal person would've ditched a "friend" like Siddhartha by this point (no one likes to be dragged around by someone else), Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley don't count, but Govinda just couldn't, could he?
Everything was relatively fine at the beginning, but Mr.Everything-Revolves-Around-What-I-Want wasn't satisfied. When is he ever? So he does what he does best, find flaws in things. He wasn't conformed with the teaching. Some he approved of, some he thought were practically pointless. All of these little things lead to a bigger thing, Siddhartha wants to start the search of a new set of morals that would fit him better.
Surprisingly enough, Govinda doesn't follow. I guess they all have to leave one day, don't they? "The Buddha has robbed me... He has robbed me of my friend, who believed in me and who now believes in him..." Siddhartha page 29.    

       

A Unique Friendship and a Complicated Stand Up (The Brahmin's Son)

I can connect Siddhartha with Gilgamesh. Both Gilgamesh and Siddhartha have philia love in their lives. They both have friends that really care about them, almost bordering on a more than a platonic relationship. Maybe even exceeding the line a bit.

I believe Govinda is the more noticeable one. “He loved the way he walked, his complete grace of movement; he loved everything that Siddhartha did and said, and above all he loved his intellect, his fine ardent thoughts, his strong will, his high vocation…”, Siddhartha page 2. I am no expert, but I am pretty sure that those are things you like and think about someone else when you like them as more than a friend. Also, it didn’t only happen in that occasion. So far, every time Govinda refers to, or thinks about Siddhartha there is a hidden awe and strong bond behind what he is saying, no matter the train of thought. 

One of the other things that surprised me about the story was how Siddhartha decided to approach his father's denial and how his father eventually conceded. "Will you go on standing and waiting until it is day, noon, evening? / I will stand and wait.", Siddhartha page 8. It was very unusual to see the amount of commitment Siddhartha had to his decision and to his beliefs. Nowadays it is very hard to find someone who is so strong willed that they will just stand there and not move for an entire day. People would rather suffer and lead a life they never wanted instead of fighting and going for what they really want. I think that is why Siddhartha stood up to his father. He was one of the few people that had the courage to stand up for what they believed, especially at that time. He wasn't only facing his father and his friend, he could also have been facing social rejection. He probably wouldn't mind, but it would always be there, hidden in a deep dark corner.